Every | body

Just last week, my son asked me, “Mummy, which part of your body do you like?”

It ought to be a simple question to answer, I suppose, but I found that I honestly couldn’t think of what to reply him.

What would you have said?

Now, here’s the thing: I don’t think I have a negative body image in general. I mean, I like my body enough to take care of it as much as I can. And I am fully aware of all my physical shortcomings, and though I am not fond of them, I have grown to accept them and do my best to work with what I have been given.

So I’m pretty okay living in my own skin. But I don’t particularly have a specific thing about my body that I’m especially proud about. Does that sound about right? Is that healthy? I wonder.

Here’s a quick summary of what it feels like living in my body:

  1. I have eczema so I often battle dry skin and random allergies and outbreaks. Not really sure what triggers it. I think certain foods do, but I don’t bother to investigate anymore. I also tend to scratch vigorously out of habit whenever I am stressed (for no particular reason).
  2. Because my body is a little on the sensitive side, I also often have colds/flus, which are mostly rhinitis (or so I think). What this means is that I frequently have a stuffy nose, am sneeezing or am battling some post-flu symptoms (sore throat, cough, phlegm, etc).
  3. I have no major health issues, but am often plagued with minor problems that are irksome. For example, I have been suffering from toenail fungus for 1-2 years now. I recently had issues involving mouth sores and an unexplained swelling of my upper lip every time I eat.
  4. I am petite in size, therefore not much of a bust and not very shapely in terms of my feminine figure. Which means that I look pretty much like a pre-adolescent.
  5. I am shortsighted and use fairly high powered lens, so this means whenever my specs get somehow knocked out of shape, I will get headaches because of the imbalance in vision. (Specs getting out of shape is even more common with a young child always in your face).
  6. I have thick, bushy, wavy hair. It looks ugly in almost any hairdo. Seriously.
  7. I am most definitely NOT tall. Haha.
  8. I had an emergency C section to give birth to Jamie so… there’s scars and also there are random pains at certain times of the month.

Well, I’m sure there are many other people out there facing bigger woes with their bodies so my issues probably pale in comparison. And I shouldn’t complain (which I generally don’t).

It just somewhat amused me that I couldn’t think of an answer with regards to what I like about my body. I guess I’m just glad everything is functioning and that I’m alive? I’m thankful for whatever God has given me, as imperfect as it is. I just don’t have a favourite part. I don’t know.

Anyway, in case you were wondering, Jamie’s answer to his own question was this: “My whole body.”

Well, at least we managed to instill in him a positive perspective about his body so far. Hehe.

Enduring pain

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Trying my best to keep my spirits up, but honestly I do not feel all that chirpy or cheery. I just feel tired. And tons of pain.

To be honest, at the start of this week, I thought that I had finally gotten used to these pregnancy related symptoms. Things were looking up when I returned to work on Wednesday. But only briefly.

First of all, I had a flu that day. And an assignment that is farther out than usual (although thankfully it was my colleague who was driving). All of that I’d say is still manageable… up until the point when I injured my back.

Yes, ladies and gents, just as life looked like it was about to improve for me, I just had to do something silly to make things worse. Apparently, something I did while out on assignment that day hurt something around the region of my tailbone. Initially, I’d hoped it was a momentary muscle pull or just a slight injury that would soon disappear by the time I went to bed and got up the next morning.

Not so. In fact, it seemed to be getting worse.

Thankfully though, the very next day was my appointment with my gynae and I brought it up (being uncertain whether it perhaps had something to do with my pregnancy). He referred me to my old orthopaedic surgeon (who thankfully is also from the same hospital) so something could be done about my back injury.

Well, the outcome of that consultation was that I was told the injury wasn’t that bad. However, there would be no painkillers or medication for me, in view of the fact that I am pregnant. The only treatment I have to relieve my pain is to use a hot/cold pack.

Let me tell you, this is a VERY painful injury. It causes me to experience aches and pains in the region just above my butt nearly every time I move: whenever I stand, sit, squat, pee, poop, lie down in bed, turn, etc.

About the only time that I feel almost no pain at all is when I stand. Uhuh. Well, I can’t be standing all day, can I?

So there you have it. Another woe to add to my list of current ailments.

Well, there is SOME good news: the gynae told me that the internal bleeding in my uterus has stopped. Medication will continue for now though.

Little Dot is growing well and now has a heartbeat that sounds akin to a galloping horse (which I’m told is a common description most pregnant ladies tend to use, for which I know understand why). The fella is looking more and more like a little body now, although limbs and facial features aren’t quite that developed yet.

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I’m trying to console myself that all this will be worth it and that I just need to endure another month and then things will get better in the second trimester. I hope that will be true.

For now, I am doing my best to take some comfort from Mr Happy, who is perpetually smiling at me.